Friend Finder

My Facebook page is always asking me to use the "Friend Finder" feature. This requires me to enter the password for my e-mail account so that FB can access my address book. FB would then invite all these people to become my friends. Why would I want to do that? The people in my e-mail address book are already friends -- or at least people I've interacted with in some way -- so why would I need to find them?

Which made me start thinking about friends.

Over the years, I've worked with people I really liked, and we considered each other friends. Sometimes we even socialized together outside of the work place. But invariably, when I left that job and went to another, very few of these people remained friends. When I see them again, we are friendly but we have grown apart. What held us together was the job; it's what we had in common, it's what we talked about, it's what the relationship was based on. It's not that I no longer like them; it's that we were really just friendly business colleagues.

But always, among these work friendships, real friendships have developed, friendships that have lasted the change of jobs. Friendships that grew because there was more to them than a shared work environment and shared joys & concerns on the job.

So what makes a friend? Of course there's that indefinable something that makes me like this person and not that one. And sometimes, I come to like someone after longer acquaintance. A friend is also someone I enjoy being around, enjoy spending time with, enjoy doing things with. We have shared interests, and I believe, shared values.

But friends are also those who will tell me the truth in love, and from whom I can hear the truth because I know that they love me. They are the ones I can call when I really need to talk to somebody. They will always listen and always care.

Friends are people who have seen me at my worst and still are willing to put up with me. And vice versa.

A story that I've used in sermons (sorry, I don't remember where it came from): A little boy is getting ready for bed, and his Dad comes to tuck him in. As Dad leaves the room, he turns out the light and starts to close the door. The little boy cries, "Daddy, leave the door open. I'm scared." The Dad comes back to the boy and says, "Don't be scared, God is with you." "But, Daddy, I need God with skin on!"

I need God with skin on, too. And I think in a lot of ways, that's what friends are.

Sheepdog Joye

New Beginnings

I've never done a blog before! But not being a total Luddite, I'm willing to give it a try!



I named this blog "The Sheep Dog" because of a question I was asked a few years ago. I am the pastor of a church named Good Shepherd. One of my members asked one day, "If Jesus is the Good Shepherd, what is the pastor of Good Shepherd called?" Answer: The Sheep Dog!



I love dogs -- always have. Right now, I'm owned by a lab-oid of unknown parentage I call a BBD -- Big Black Dog. I have since discovered there is an entire website devoted to Big Black Dogs -- apparently nobody wants to adopt them.



Anyway, I think it's pretty cool to be considered a sheep dog. Because sheep dogs get to help The Shepherd -- and that's a great thing!



One of the wonderful things about dogs is how they are able to communicate with us. They learn to understand what we're asking of them, even though we do it in ways that are initially incomprehensible to dogs. We use words, they use smells. We learn to interpret some of their body language, they read ours perfectly. I laugh at the way my dog cocks his head listening to me when I'm speaking utter gibberish -- at least in terms of his limited vocabulary. But let me pick up the leash and he knows exactly what's going to happen.



I'm sure dogs get very frustrated when we don't understand what they want from us. My dog has a way of letting me know his food bowl is empty by pawing at me til I get it. Sometimes I just can't figure out what he wants, and he finally gives up and lays his head in my lap as if to say, "It's okay if you don't understand. I love you anyway."



Dogs have a lot to teach us. I've lived and travelled in other countries where people don't speak English. For the most part, I haven't been able to speak their language well enough to really communicate verbally. But I've marveled at how we can communicate if we work at it -- through gestures and drawings, patiently trying to figure out the other person's meaning. A lot of that communication comes through carefully observing what the other person is doing while she or he speaks. One thing I know doesn't work -- speaking loudly in English! And I've also learned that if the only words you know in someone else's language are "Please" and "Thank you", people will generally be delighted and will do all they can to help.



I suspect there's a sermon in this somewhere.



Peace,

Sheepdog Joye